Beginning The Book

Posted on Feb 17, 2013 in Me | 0 comments

“If you don’t write the book you have to write, everything breaks.”  -A.M. Homes

I have to, I guess then.

If it’s written non-emotionally it won’t resonate with anyone.  I can see, just glancing over the catastrophe of words and paragraphs cobbled together on my laptop that the most powerful sentences are those I’ve copied directly from the online diary I kept at the time.

So I need to go back there.

Relive the dusky evening reality shifted and the possibility I’d got it wrong wormed it’s way into my fundamentalist brain.

Access again the consuming wave of grief that morning in the car nearly two years later when God finally died.

Feel afresh the moment I realised that if you don’t make a choice between the man you love and the person you are, he will make it for you.

And so I begin the walk towards what I run from the most.

Emotions.

 

Think I’m going to need another glass of whisky.

 

Bit of light reading over your coffee?