If You’re In Love With Someone It Means…?

Posted on May 31, 2013 in Life | 4 comments

So… I was thinking about Love this morning.

Sitting on the floor of my apartment by the balcony in a square of sunshine, laptop balanced on my knees, head resting sideways against the glass door staring at the patch of blue sky overhead.

If you Love Someone, it means you will:

  • never love anyone else ever
  • live in the same house, sleep in the same bed
  • marry them
  • have kids with them

But does it?

I’ve got the uneasy feeling this is something else I was taught that isn’t true. That the only person worthy of saying “I Love You” to is the person you know you would do all of the above with.


Can someone say I Love You if they’re not sure if they’d have babies with the other person?  Can they say I love You even if they know they wouldn’t move countries for them?

I know people who would say yes, absolutely, love comes in many different forms.  And people would say, no, love isn’t temporal, it’s eternal and numero uno.


As with everything, it is probably whatever you want to define it.

And so another age old question goes onto my list…

What Is Love?


Your thoughts?

Bit of light reading over your coffee?

  • cjschepers

    Young, romantic love… I’ll wipe-your-arse-when-you’re-sick love… The love of my cat or dog saved me from throwing in the towel when life fell off a cliff… All
    “forms” of love. Love is stronger than fear.

    • And all of them wrapped up in those three little words “I Love You!” No wonder we’re confused…

  • ockraz

    I remember asking this of myself. As I said on another post, I’ve basically been atheist or agnostic for about as long as I’ve known there’s no Santa*. So, I don’t think that these questions really have anything tp do with being religious, although they may be related to how one was brought up in a general way…

    ‘What is love?’ –
    That’s an ages old philosophical question. (It’s also a 90s hit. http://youtu.be/xhrBDcQq2DM)

    “If I say, ‘I love you,’, am I telling the truth? Do I merely like and care about this person with great intensity? Is there a difference?” –
    That’s probably something most everyone wonders at some point- except perhaps for insensitive people who say it knowing it’s a complete lie, just to get the upper hand.

    I don’t know if this will be helpful, but there are two things that I decided after I’d thought about it for a long time, and they helped me decide what to do:
    1. I didn’t want my worrying about the significance of the word to prevent me from being happy or saying something that someone wanted to hear. It’s not taking out a mortgage. I realized that I could honestly say, “I love you” to lots of people. I started saying it to my best friend. I said it to (some) family members. It demystified it for me. When I felt it kind of welling up inside as if it wanted to be said and I was resisting the impulse, I wasn’t afraid to just say it to the girl I was seeing romantically. As it turned out, that didn’t last, but it welled up again with someone else about 18 months later. I don’t know if that’s good, bad, or indifferent.
    2. Demystifying “I love you” was freeing and I think I became closer to friends and family after I got comfortable saying it, but I also had hedged my bets a little. I kept “in love” in reserve. I’ve only ever told two people that I was “in love” with them. I decided that I’d hold onto that for when I thought, “this is someone I’ll still want to be with ten years from now.”
    *: Do you say Santa or Father Christmas in Australia?

    • That’s actually a really beautiful way of looking it! Demystifying the words ‘I love you’ but reserving being ‘in love’ for when you have something much bigger… hopefully I get to feel that too someday! 😀